NRIs (Non-Resident Indians) represent our country at a global stage and have done well for themselves in other countries. They are generally a nice, world wise and genuine lot. Well, most of them. There are a few who get on your nerves. They leave India with some baggage and come back to the country with some baggage of the douchey kind. And these 13 things are the most annoying of the lot.
1. They acquire a goofy “foreign” accent.
I always find it amusing how a U.S return can carry a Brit accent. Seriously?
2. The really corny ones start using American slang. Even though they’ve come back from South Africa.
“Yo! Sup dawg?” Wait, what? Don’t you dare call me dawg. You are a dawg.
3. Sports for them is now all about N.B.A and baseball.
And as soon as there’s a India v/s Pakistan cricket match, they forget everything go “Sachin! Sachin!”
4. They now find everything to be “too spicy.”
All Indian cuisine is way too spicy for them now. Curry or no curry.
5. They drink only and only, bottled water.
And sometimes they demand sparkling water too. Whatever that is.
6. They crib about the pollution in India.
You should be glad we’re not China. And if you’ve come back from China, you need to S.T.F.U.
7. They have a thing for “labels” now.
Even if they can’t pronounce Gucci and Versace.
8. They need tissues. All the time.
Hehehe. We know what’s going on here.
9. They now need industrial strength mosquito repellant.
Okay, we get it, we have mosquitoes. But you knew that already right? And it’s not like you’ve never been bitten by one, right?
10. Stray animals are scary for them now.
“O.M.G! A dog in the middle of the street. Is this a zoo?”
11. It’s always “too much noise” for them. Everywhere.
“Why are you talking to each other? It’s too much noise ya!”
12. Everything is dirty.
“Chee! I can’t have this Pani Puri. It’s so dirty!”
13. Every sentence starts with a “back in the states…”
You know, back when you were sane, you weren’t such a huge pain in the ass.
VAMSI KRISHNA